New episodes of Skins! :) They are very bad :(

 

Oh man, this show.  THIS SHOW.  It is so bad now!  I just finished watching the third episode of the new season, and while it and the previous two episodes had some good parts (just a few), it is overall an awful, awful show now.  It’s like the Russia episode from the first season, but ALL THE TIME (that’s how I judge Skins quality, because up until now that was the worst episode, although it is probably not nearly as bad as I remember since it had the original cast of characters that I had come to know and love, and all of those guys were much more likable than these new kids MORE ON THAT LATER).  Anyways, here are some lists:

Bad things:

• I guess the thing I hate the most is how all of the “we are a show that realistically depicts how teenagers do drugs and have sex and stuff” of Seasons 1 and 2 has been amped up so now it’s like “Look at us, we’re doing DRUGS and sexing it up ALL THE TIME!  We are so EXTREEEEEME!”  That is very obnoxious!  No one wants to listen to a bunch of kids brag about how much (vague and unspecified) DRUGS they do.  “DRUGS DRUGS DRUGS!” - kids on new Skins

• Also, the characters are not very likable for the most part.  They can be very annoying and self-obsessed!  I wouldn’t want to hang out with them!  And why is Effie such a slut now?  Boo, Effie.  Put some clothes on.

• That story line with the gangsters?  Dumb.  Why are a bunch of adults trying to beat up on a bunch of children?  Because that one kid saw the gang leader in a brothel?  And this kid is a 15-year-old sex addict who frequents brothels WITH HIS FRIENDS (actual line from Skins, season 3: “I’m never going to a brothel with you again”)?  No.  Children don’t go to brothels.  Though to be fair, this is very similar to the story arc in the first season with the Mad Twatter, who tried to hunt the old gang down after Sid bought 300 quid of spliff from him (in a brothel!) which was promptly lost when they drove the car into the river.  But somehow that seemed a lot more believable.

• A fart joke, really?  UGH.  Since when did my favorite smart (smart!) teen dramedy resort to such comedic lows?  Oh yeah, this new season.
  

Good things:

• There have been some excellent guest stars!  Gareth from The Office is the gangster (see above)!  Oh, and look here, it’s David Baddiel, fucking Effie’s mom!  I hope he comes back, he was only there for like 20 seconds.

• I liked Thomas, the African immigrant kid.  He seemed like a nice guy.  Too bad he got sent back to the Congo for partying too hard  (also, I was very proud of myself for being able to identify his thumb instrument as an mbira.  Thanks, Understanding Music class!).  That's him, looking very sad.

• And I guess two of the girls are lesbians?  Okay.  Got 2 b diverse.  By the way, this new cast is looking very much like the old one.  I’ve got it all figured out:  the lesbian twin = Maxxie, the other lesbianish girl = Jal, Cook = Chris, the slutty twin = Michelle, Pandora = Cassie, Freddy = Tony, Thomas = Anwar, JJ = Sid, and Effie = Effie.  Yup, that’s it.

• And Pandora’s crazy aunt, with the chainsaws and marijuana tea?  She was cool.
  

That’s about it, I think.  In summation, Skins is bad now, but I will keep watching.  Maybe it will get better.  Right now it is more of a hate-watching thing than a love-watching thing, though.  But we’ll see.  WE’LL SEE.

ALSO:  apparently there is going to be an American remake of Skins on MTV.  This is terrible (terrible!) news for many reasons, but mostly because MTV.  It will probably be worse than the inevitable remake of The Goonies will inevitably be (that is how I judge these things).

In Memoriam

My Black Boots

April 22, 2007 - August 26, 2009

In the entire time that I have known you, you were a magnificent pair of shoes. You were pretty reliable - at least up until that time a hole appeared in the left shoe - but what I will remember most is how cool-looking you were. So cool! You looked unlike any other shoe I had ever worn or seen, yet you were not flashy nor obnoxious. There was truly a subtle greatness about you. Truth be told, you were actually quite simple in appearance, just a regular old pair of black rubber boots with blue trims. But because of this simplicity I was able to wear you with just about any outfit. You always added a kick (I would “haha! puns!” but that is inappropriate) to my wardrobe, and for that I am grateful.


We had a lot of great times together, but I’ll be honest, I didn’t really love you at the beginning. I can still remember the day I first met you - Earth Day, 2007. I stopped by Buffalo Exchange to kill some time before my piano lesson and there was a sale going on. Lots of items for just a dollar or two. Even some shoes were just a dollar! You were two of those shoes. When I saw you crammed between two pairs of lightly used sandals, I thought “Well, those look interesting. I don’t have any boots, maybe I should buy them. They’re only a dollar! Then again, they do look kind of worn, and it would be more practical to get those sandals as I do live in a desert. BUT, they look kind of neat. And they’re only a dollar! Oh what the hell, ratty old boots it is! Practicality be damned!” I didn’t even bother trying you on because I wasn’t wearing socks.

I soon realized that you were a great pair of shoes. Every time I wore you, I liked you a little bit more. I received a lot of compliments about you; someone would say “I like your boots, Lauren!” or “Cool boots! Where’d you get those?” and I would go “Thanks! Thrift store!” and then they might ask “So what kind of shoes are they?” and I would say “I dunno. There’s no label but it says ‘Made in Korea’ on the bottom!” Ah, so many memories, Boots!

Here are some more memories:

• I was really excited to have rain boots because I thought they would be perfect for running around in the rain and jumping in puddles. Our first summer together I said “Man, I can’t wait until it rains and I can jump in puddles with these boots on!” a lot of times, but it took me a while to get to do that because of the terrible non-existent weather conditions in Arizona. Probably our most memorable rain time was in DC, actually. It was our third or fourth weekend here and there was a huge storm, after which we ran around campus with some friends (my friends, not your friends, you are just a pair of shoes, an inanimate object, really), looking for the biggest puddles (parking lot!). You protected my feet from getting soaked. Thanks!

• While I was making the transition from living in Arizona to living in DC I had a lot of packages shipped to me. They were full of things I hadn’t had room for in my luggage - bulky items, and forgotten peanut butter jars. One of these packages contained you, Boots. I think it was the last package to arrive here, weeks after my relocation. This was because my mother was reluctant to ship you, or in any way aid in my wearing of you. She always had a strong aversion to you. I never understood why. Oh sure, there was a lot of “They’re so ugly! PLEASE let me throw them out! For heaven’s sake, I’ll buy you a new pair!” but I think, deep down, she was just jealous. Same with Diana. I don’t recall either of them every having a pair of boots like mine . . .

• There was also that time when I went to the zoo with Omar during Spring Break. The day had started out promising, but it started to drizzle a bit by the afternoon. We figured it would still be okay to visit the zoo; it was just a little rain, not much, and besides, I had my rain boots! I would be okay! NO. A few hours later, and my entire left foot was soaked and freezing. I thought, “Well that’s weird, my right foot is perfectly dry. I wonder how that happened!” It wasn’t until later that I realized there was a mammoth-sized hole in the heel of the left shoe. MAMMOTH-sized (how I hadn’t noticed it before then is beyond me. All the signs were there: mysteriously sudden moistness in the left shoe, a strangely imbalanced ratio of pebbles-to-shoe. But I guess I don’t look at the bottom of my shoes often enough).

Now, some people might say that when you find a MAMMOTH-SIZED hole in your shoe you should probably throw it out, especially since the pair of shoes it belongs to only cost one dollar to begin with. But those people would be wrong, and you should not listen to them. I continued to wear you, Boots, for a good five months after finding said hole. Five months! I just couldn’t bear to thoughtlessly toss you away; you were my favorite pair of shoes! So, I kept wearing you, but from then on I was very careful to avoid puddles, mud, sandy beaches, and gravel. And that worked out just fine!

At least, until five days ago. I was walking, rather hurriedly, to my aunt and uncle’s house to pick up some luggage when I noticed the heel was slipping out the back of the right shoe, creating several large openings. This was highly distressing. When I arrived at their house, I asked my cousin Max if I could borrow some duct tape, perhaps black duct tape if possible. Lo and behold! there was black duct tape in the kitchen. I shoved the heel back in the shoe and taped up the holes. I also covered the mammoth-sized hole in the left shoe. As I was fixing them up, I thought, “Well this isn’t going to last for long. But I just can’t throw them away without doing everything I possibly can to try and fix them! I will keep wearing them until they fall apart, even more than they already have.”

I kept wearing you, Boots, until you fell apart, even more than you already had. That was two days ago. The heel kept popping out, and I realized the duct tape wasn’t going to cut it. I was forced to admit that that wasn’t going to work. Not then, not ever. You were dead. I was sad.

I miss you, Boots. You were truly one of a kind.